It’s My Turn…

In February, we moved to Tucson, AZ.  What a great city!  The traffic sucks, but not like Seattle at rush hour.   He has friends here, and now, so do I.  I have a social life!  My life is full of interesting characters, like the new ones in the stories I have been writing.

 

I’m surrounded by lovers of theater and music; I’ve spent a lot of my life around artists, dancers, actors, and musicians.  But, the Muse, she is so very enthusiastic right now–the living creative spirit is here!

I’ve been writing.  Hard.  Consistently.  I am determined, and motivated.

My new author website will be up in a week or so.  There will be news about all new forthcoming  books, ebooks, and print books.  There will be story excerpts.

I honestly have no excuse for being so sporadic on social networking and writing blogs, except to say that the books won’t write themselves…and I have a life.

Thank you to my devoted readers who still send me emails and follow me.  But no,  I’m not yet sure when I will begin a new Radio Show.  I only have 2 hands, and I can’t do it all at once.  I suppose I should hire an Assistant…we shall see.

In the meantime, I will let you all know what is coming and when; but feel free to continue sending me those thoughtful and sometimes hilarious emails. They always make my day!

 

Much love to you all…

 

Cara

 

 

 

Been a while…

Hello everyone! It’s been a while since I have written in this blog.  And I apologize to my followers for being absent for so long.  I should really hire an assistant so that I can get more writing done, but that’s just not an option at this time.  You wonder why I am MIA so much?

Well,  let me enlighten you…

 

One, I’m a Graphic Designer, a Web Developer/Designer and Web host, not to mention Webmaster.  I have 6 websites to maintain…so redesigns and updating happen regularly. I’m updating 3 of them now, and about to build a few others for new clients.

I’m not only an author, but also a Publisher, and I am currently in the process of publishing a few new authors so I have not had time to do much of my own writing this year, but I’m working on that in my off time. (when I have off time)

And finally, for those of you who have known or followed me for the past 10 years, I finally have a life!  I moved to Arizona a few years ago, I’m in a meaningful and committed relationship, and….well, let’s just say that things are happening in the world of C.D.Grant!

I’m slowly coming back, so keep an eye out!

~Cara

~C

Questioning the Answer

Photo by Chris Sardegna

Awake at 3 a.m., 229 projects and 10 years later-

Where would you be—right now—if I had not given up my own goals and pursuits to help you get everything that you wanted?

Where would I be?

6:52 a.m. PST…

36 cancelled projects.

5 New projects – titled, “C.D.Grant”

When A Woman’s Heart Is True…

Author Photo©2015, C.D.Grant. All Rights Reserved.

“When A Woman’s Heart Is True…”

Her knowledge of “self” for definition
sometimes hidden in denial for a time
is so very total & extremely profound
and unveiled layer by painful layer…..

She belies the physical, for she is more
She is her own reason for being

 

 

She is not lacking in anything
She is internally self-sufficient
not a half, but a whole….already complete
needs no one else for this task.

She is a whole woman of substance
not diminished by reason or debate
She can hide the pain of words & actions
She will cry alone at the fear of abandon.

Her personality is an enclosed wonderland
opened with a key of magical possibilities
“love” is her true self – magnified for all
Her identity welcomes the honesty & truths
hidden within a world of lies, deceit & pain.

Her gift to you is unconditional love & faith
Her gift to herself is her body & soul
She knows the way to give herself true pleasure
fulfilling endless moments of damning loneliness.

Only she can find the vast wells of spirituality within
waiting to overflow with compassion for the unloved
She accepts that none is unworthy, only ignorant of her nature
Her heart ready to expand to accept yet again more pain, is her lot.

She is a whole woman of substance
not diminished by words or actions of another
She gives her body as her lovers playground
Lovingly enduring and willingly accepting all from your vanity

She is an amazing woman with a gift….
Hers is a unique expression of self ….
She is awesome in her own right….
Hers is a gift like no other…

When a woman’s heart is true…
She is free.

© 2006, Carolanne Grant. All rights reserved.

© 2015, Aliterati Publishing. All rights reserved.No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of the copyright owner or the publisher.

Wringing tears from stone

“You can beat a stone to dust, yet you can never cause it to cry out in pain” – C. D. Grant, 2015

The only thing you can hurt, is yourself. 

A woman commented to me a few weeks ago, “Young lady, you are always wearing a bright beautiful smile!  We never know if you are going through anything, or if you are in pain, because no one ever sees you without a smile.”  I just smiled, winked, and kept moving.

The truth is, some days, the reality of life slaps you in the face, and it is impossible to smile around it.  Just like the impossibility of causing a stone pain. I simply don’t leave the house those days.  I reflect and meditate.  I pray while I try to empathize with people in a world that no longer cares.  I try not to dwell too long on the fact that forming human connections in a digital world is a useless endeavor, and that moments of shared happiness are dependent upon my digital connection to the rest of the world.

And now,  here I sit, staring at the wall that holds those stones that I tried to beat to dust so that I could finally be free.  I’m supposed to be writing a research paper right now, but my mind won’t allow me to focus on that particular task.  So, here I am, writing to keep the tears at bay. Those tears, my reflections–have absolutely nothing to do with what I am writing today, but then again, perhaps they do.

Those who know me, know that I own terrific nomadic tendencies.  However, thinking on my heritage, the nationalities from whence I came, it finally clicked.  My ancestors were gypsies, farmers, fishermen, and homesteaders; they traveled with the seasons and made their homes where they landed.

While I am not entirely ‘lonely’, I do miss sharing life with another individual.  I miss having friends who share my interests and motivations.

I don’t say this for pity, or sympathy; I’ve just never had a true ‘home’, no place where I felt like I belonged–nowhere to unpack and throw away the boxes (because I never wanted to leave)

But is this pattern really just a part of who I am?  Or is it simply because I am human,  and cannot ignore that there’s that part of me who wants to find a mate, make a home, and never wander again?

This is just today’s momentary reflection, and I’m not a stone.

But I’ve just worked it out by writing, to be shared with whomever may be out there and reading.

So I’m smiling again, but now I must go write that paper that is due in a few hours.

Dear World…

Author Photo©2015, C. D. Grant, All Rights Reserved.

I love you irregardless of what you eat, smoke, or drink. I love you no matter who you choose to sleep with, what gender you identify with, or that you have a chosen lifestyle…these are your personal decisions.

I don’t care what your skin color is, what nationality you are, who your ancestors were or what country they came from.

It doesn’t matter where you live or who you love, I love you all—and my love is non-judgmental, non-discriminating, and non-class related; it gives no matter as to your industry, celebrity, average or below-average lifestyle. My love is not financially motivated, nor politically defined. It doesn’t matter what your religious beliefs may be, or that your spiritual practice may differ from mine.

For those who are alone in the world, and think that you have no one to listen to your heart, to move your spirit, or feed your intellectual center… I just want you to know that someone else out here is more in tune with you than you think. I’ve been thinking of you, praying for you, and ready to listen to you if you feel like reaching out.

I love you because it is who I am, it is my life’s purpose, my reason for being, my path, and my joy.

I love you because you are a child of the universe; borne of the only world that we humans will ever share (in this lifetime).

The only thing I have to share with the world is love. Whether through pen or spoken word, I give you love without self-seeking, without need for promotion, and without self-serving pride.

Today is my 50th birthday, and I’ve learned that love shared with the utmost gratitude and the deepest humility is genuine, compassionate, understanding, forgiving, and honest.

My love has no boundaries, and I can accept that it is not always returned.

Carolanne D. Grant

Holiday Wishes….

Carolanne is getting a breather from academia at the moment, although I will still be studying to get ahead of my course schedules; but while I was busy, it seems that the holiday’s have come upon us full force.

For many of us, it is a time for comforting memories, or missing those who have left this world, and for some–it’s about missing those who may have transitioned to other places in life. For some of you, it’s the rush and rumble of traffic and travel, shopping, and good-natured arguments as last-minute shopping gets done and extra guests at the table inspire yet more cooking.

Whatever you may be doing this Holiday Season, I wish you a safe, blessed, and beautiful time…

Carolanne

MIA and Back Again…

Hello Everyone!

Yes, I know, Carolanne is very bad at blogging, and even worse at social networking.  I’m going to tell you why in a moment.  However, I wanted to apologize to my readers for my disappearance.  This year, was the last that I would be allowed a Student Loan to complete my degree program, so in July, I began what is to be my final 16 months of college.  I will finally have my degree in November 2015.  In case you’re wondering, Bachelor of Fine Arts in Graphic Design.

It’s been great so far, life experience and years of self-study (32 various subjects) have helped immensely in earning my current A’s.

Once again, my writing is on hold (which irks me to no end!) I have a head full of stories but no time to write them!  I suppose the ultimate Christmas gift for myself would be a digital voice recorder.  Although,  I think that will have to wait until later, Carolanne has to update her wardrobe, shoes, and ….everything. ‘yikes!’; Oh well, perhaps a birthday present for myself then.

I’ve been working back here on Aliterati’s website again…had a few mishaps and missteps with the web host, but we’re fixing what needs to be fixed, and as I have time, I will get to it.  School is my #1 priority right now.  Business, second.  Aliterati Publishing’s website will be up before you know it; I’ve decided not to announce a date, because every time I do…something holds it up!  So, I won’t jinx it this time, you’ll just have to wait for the announcement like everyone else.  It won’t be that long…that’s all I’m saying on that subject!

Now, on to the heart of the matter…

I’m very bad at social networking and blogging, 1. because of time constraints, and 2. because no one really cares what I have to say.

No, I’m not having a pity party (although I did for a moment); no, this has to do with the ever-advancing world of digital media and how we humans no longer wish to connect with another human being on a personal level.  Even a physical level.

3 years ago, my phone never stopped ringing…I honestly had to shut it off to get sleep, to cook uninterrupted, to watch a movie, bathe, and to write.  Everyone is posting on FaceBook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn…they have all become social networking junkies; but when is the last time one of my friends actually dialed my phone number?  I think it was 2010.  If it weren’t for business relationships, doctors appointments,  life coaching clients, and collection agencies….well, I would just terminate my cell phone service period.

Really?  Death notices by FaceBook?  The advance of social networking has created a culture of misinformed, unintelligent, and distant human beings; and I for one, am tired of it.  I’m a social butterfly, a communicator!  I love long talks, chatting about nothing at all, or having philosophical arguments.  I used to love having movie night, when my friends would come over, we’d all cook together, laugh and tell dumb jokes while drinking good wine and good-naturedly picking on one another.  But people don’t do those things any more.  They don’t talk, they text.  Why they even bother to have number pads on phones any longer is beyond me. Of course, now there are tablets and ipads….

I talk to the walls, watch movies alone, people-watch; do you know that most everyone has a phone or tablet in their hand…but no one talks?  I worry about going back into the workforce for fear of exploding into social conversation during a job interview….just for having someone to talk to.  No, I would never do that, but I dreamed about it the other night. That stuck with me, and I knew it was time to start writing something, so I thought that I would begin here, in my blog.

I hope you all had a lovely Summer!  Come on in and chat with me here when you have a moment.  I will come answer between assignments!

Changes…ad nauseum

I’ve found that life is a series of choices & decisions, but the things that we hold dearest don’t change, they only increase in their base nature of either good or bad. However,  the people that we hold close to our hearts are the most inconsistent. ~ C.D.Grant

I was watching television the other night.  This in itself is different for me, because I don’t watch television on a regular basis.  I don’t watch the news because it’s depressing. I don’t watch anyone’s reality shows because they’re just plain stupid, and I’m not into false drama and b.s.

I don’t care what celebrity is getting married, to whom they are getting married, or what they wore grocery shopping.  My local government doesn’t give a damn about me, my city has nowhere for me to live, and damn it–I just wanna watch a movie in peace.  You’d think that this was a simple request.  No, I have about 12 minutes of commercials with which to go find something else to do…

Does it bother anyone else that the amount of tracking &  target marketing used to invade our personal space is ridiculously infinite?  Yet, creating beautiful Marketing materials, graphics, and campaigns is part of what I do…go figure!

So…onto the whole point of this post!

I have made a few decisions which are about to greatly impact my business’ immediate future.   I have decided to take a few months off to finish writing, and get ready for publishing, my own books! 

For those interested, my 1st book is a collection of Erotic Short Story Literature;

“Eros Comes in Black Satin: Volume I by Lady Eros“

is here (and also available on Amazon): http://www.shop.trimaxxpublishers.com/

      Volume II – Illusions & Other Secret Desires by Carolanne D. Grant (writing as Lady Eros) (is 8 stories from completion!)

 

I do write across several genres and have more manuscripts to complete; so I’ve got something for every mood! *seriously, I have no reason not to write!*

Give me a few more days –   I am writing 90 minutes every day until I am used to writing all day (probably ‘night’) again!

Coffee, Chocolate & Cigarettes by C.D.Grant

Contemporary Short-Story Fiction | General

When Words Fail a novel by C.D.Grant 

An Erotic Psychological Thriller

The Book of Dreams by C.D.Grant

Contemporary Short-Story Fiction |  Fantasy

….and there are more!

In between each, I will break to publish a few more authors and get back to the business of design….

(Unless a certain dreamy-eyed * Actor/Playwright * Singer/Songwriter/Recording Artist –  in Hollywood, CA decides that distracting me is MUCH better for my health!)

What Exactly Do You ‘Do’ Carolanne?

How do you take a lifetime’s worth of knowledge, skills, expertise and experience and put in all in one category?

Well, the short answer is “I can’t”.

The longer answer would be for you to download my CV which I will make available here.

2014-update_CDGrant_CV_web